Rivalry Week! Boise State vs. Idaho
Being rivalry week, I have to pass on these jokes that were emailed to me at work.
Q. What’s the difference between the Idaho Vandals & the Taliban?
A. The Taliban have a running game
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Q. How do the Idaho Vandals count to 10?
A. 0-1, 0-2, 0-3, 0-4, 0-5, 0-6, 0-7, 0-8, 0-9, 0-10
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Q. What do the Idaho Vandals & Billy Graham have in common?
A. They both can make 5,000 people stand up & yell “Jesus Christ” !
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Q. How do you keep an Idaho Vandal out of your yard?
A. Put up goal posts
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Q. Where do the Idaho Vandals go in case of a tornado?
A. To the Kibbie Dome – they never get a touchdown there!
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Q. What do you call a Vandal with a Bowl Championship ring?
A. A thief
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Q. Why doesn’t Grangeville have a college football team?
A. Because then Moscow would want one
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Q. Why was Nick Holt upset when the Idaho Vandals playbook was stolen?
A. Because he hadn’t finished coloring it.
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Q. What’s the difference between the Idaho Vandals and a dollar bill?
A. You can still get four quarters out of a dollar
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Q. How many Idaho Vandals does it take to win a Conference Championship?
A. Nobody knows and we may never find out!
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Q. What do you call 47 people sitting around a TV watching a Bowl Game?
A. The Idaho Vandals
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Q. What do the Idaho Vandals and possums have in common?
A. Both play dead at home and get killed on the road
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Q. How can you tell when the Idaho Vandals are going to run the football?
A. The back leaves the huddle with tears in his eyes.
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Q: What did the Idaho student get on his SAT score?
A: Drool
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Q: What’s the best thing to ever come out of Moscow?
A: Highway 95
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Q: How do you get 40 Idaho students into a VW Bug?
A: Throw in a bottle of Mad Dog
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Q: Did you know that the toothbrush was invented by a U of I student?
A: Because if it were invented by a BSU student it would have been called a teethbrush
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Q: DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE SKELETON THEY JUST FOUND AT UofI?
A: IT WAS THE 1938 HIDE & SEEK CHAMP!
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Q. WHAT ARE THE TOUGHEST 6 YEARS IN A VANDAL’S LIFE?
A. 3RD GRADE
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Q. What’s the difference between a Vandal football player and a bucket of puck?
A. The bucket.
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Q. Why can’t the vandal football team gain access to the internet?
A. Because they can’t put 3 w’s together.
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Q: What do you call 3 Vandal running backs standing shoulder to shoulder?
A: A wind tunnel.
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Q. Why did BSU decide to keep the blue turf instead of changing to green?
A. So the UofI cheerleaders wouldn’t graze before the game…
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Q. How do three Vandal football players play hide-and-seek?
A. One goes to hide, and the other two try to figure out who left.
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Q: Why do UofI graduates put their degree in their windshield?
A: So they can park in the handicapped spots.
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Q: Why are UofI co-eds always found lying on the beach?
A: Because even the tide won’t take them out!
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Q: What’s the difference between a UofI co-ed and Bigfoot?
A: One is big and hairy and smells bad. The other has big feet.
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Q. You know how to get a Vandul off your front porch?
A. Pay for the Pizza.
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Q. What do you get when you cross a vandal and a groundhog?
A. Six more weeks of bad football
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Did you hear about the Vandal football players who were stuck on the escalator at the mall for two hours during a power outage?
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The teacher of a first grade class asked her students what their daddy did for a living. She noticed that little Billy did not respond as each student told about their daddy’s work.
Finally she convinced Billy to talk about his daddy’s work. Little Billy said “My daddy is an exotic dancer, he strips for other men and sometimes goes back into that backroom to have sex with men for money”! The teach says, “Billy, does your daddy really do that?”
Little Billy starts to cry and says “No, I was just to embarrassed to tell anyone what daddy really does”!
Teacher: “What does your daddy really do”?
Billy: “He is a football coach at the University of Idaho.”
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A Boise State grad walks into a bar in Moscow and orders a white wine. All the good ole boys sitting around the bar look up, expecting to see some pitiful refugee from the north.
The bartender says, “You ain’t from around here, are ya?”
The guy says, “No, I’m from Boise, and a proud graduate of the Boise State.”
The bartender says, “What do you do in Moscow?”
The Bronco says, “I’m a taxidermist.”
The bartender says, “A taxidermist? What in tarnation is a taxidermist? Do you drive a taxi?”
“No, a taxidermist doesn’t drive taxis! I mount animals,” sniffed the Bronco. The bartender grins and hollers, “It’s okay boys. He’s one of us!”
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…and the best one-liner:
THE UNIVERSITY OF IDAHO HAS A FOOTBALL TEAM.
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